Oh, Happy birthday to myself

Oh, happy birthday to myself.

When the night comes, the thoughts of you swarm into my world. If you never appeared in my life, I would not have the pain; if you never gave me a kiss, I would not care about you day and night. However, what’s gone is gone.

I think I am such a greedy person. I am covetous to seek every moment about you from my memories. Even though I am away from you, from your life, I still miss you with each passing second. I even tried to play swing till I was extremely tired. I thought I could sleep, but I couldn’t. I hold the phone and touch those numbers again, again and again, but still I am not brave to dial. Little by little, tears were out like a river. Just one day, one min, we become stranger. We are near, but our hearts are far from each other miles away.

When I have insomnia, I know the feeling for you is called love.

When I wake up from the dream, I believe the feeling for you is called forever.

When time is up, I know the feeling for you is called empty

When we are apart, I believe the feeling for you is called down.

I understand at the end: I am not lonely when I am alone, but I am lonely whenever I miss you.